How well is your communication serving you? עברית למטה
How would your life be if you:
What is NVC?
NVC is an approach to communication and awareness which helps us stay close to life and increase the likelihood of connection, even in difficult circumstances. NVC teaches consciousness of universal human needs (the energy of life) and a 4-step model for connection. Over the past 6 years it has deeply informed and transformed my life and interactions, a huge player in bringing me to the heartful intimacy I live with today.
A simple example: I was sitting on the train and found myself in conversation with the few people around me. One young man was sharing his opinion and didn't seem to be open to hearing other perspectives. I found myself becoming irritated - I too wanted to contribute and have the sense of connection I get from being heard. And then, a shift. I opened up to what need might be animating him at the moment - a real yearning to be seen, to get recognition, it seemed to me. When I shifted to listen to him from that awareness, that he was really wanting recognition, that this was the underlying drive in his sharing, I found in myself a place of compassion that brought up an openness, a patience, a willingness to give him space for those few minutes, but now from a place of open-heartedness rather than begrudging resistance. That little shift in awareness created a big shift in me, my energy, and the mood I carried into the day.
Another example: with Shabbat approaching I made plans to meet my girlfriend at her apartment and asked her when to expect she would be home. I arrived at the appointed time, and waited, and waited....and waited. I was feeling anxious about not having enough time for everything I wanted to get done, and frustrated about the discrepancy in between her words and actions. Finally she arrived and we went inside. Noting the anger and discontent I was feeling, I realized I had a choice - either let it fester and feel distant and begrudging for the coming hours, or bring it up and hope for some return to connectedness. So I brought it up. And she started to explain her habit of underestimating the time it takes to get things done. I was disappointed- I'm not looking for an explanation, I shared, but rather to be able to discharge this feeling and to be heard, are you available for that? Yes. So I shared what I was feeling and asked for her to reflect that to me so I could get some recognition. Familiar with NVC, she did that, giving me space to feel what I was feeling and acknowledging the unmet needs at the root of my experience - consideration, reliability, etc, without needing to justify herself or to take on being 'wrong'. With that experience of being seen and acknowledged, my anger and frustration quickly dissipated with connection, intimacy, gratitude, and newfound energy in their place. Wow!
This is the power of Non-Violent Communication (NVC). In this foundations course, we will develop a consciousness of universal human needs as the root of our actions and feelings. This allows us to connect on a human level regardless of the content of a given situation. Whereas connection is often based on agreement, here we discover possibilities of connection and compassion in the heart of human experience, without needing to agree. We will enrich our intimacy with the palette of human emotion beyond feeling "good, bad, and, uhh, fine" and develop the capacity for empathy and connection to ourselves and others in ways that are deeply fulfilling and provide access to the possibilities described above. We will learn to defuse blame and judgment and open to the tender humanness and heart-to-heart connection that makes life full of meaning and richness. The foundations course will be a step-by-step exploration of the art of connection and the way that the everyday language we use can serve or impede us in achieving and sustaining such communication. We'll develop proficiency with the classic 4-stage NVC model (Observation, Feelings, Needs, Request) that helps us find connection and empathy throughout our lives. As a practically oriented course, we will have ample opportunity for practice and integration, exploring how this approach and understanding can dramatically shift your relationships with others and yourself and lead you towards a life of greater heartfulness and joy.
The class will be limited to 12 participants to ensure intimacy and personal attention.
8 3.5hour sessions
Organize a course, ask questions:
Danny: 0525435455, firstname.lastname@example.org
Testimonial from a previous student:
His commitment to teach how to communicate in a way that nurtures compassion and closeness is of the highest caliber. He himself role models the NVC way of both speaking and listening as he engages with the “other” where transparency and vulnerability prevail, allowing for a genuine and warm connection. Danny would not only bring his tenured experience in NVC to class, not only his passion and sense of joy to share this way of communicating with his students, but as well, he brought resources, exercises and a well thought-out lesson for each week. He raised the bar, challenged us in the safest way imaginable, and again, has profoundly affected how I now go about my day --- how I listen and how I speak as I engage with others." - Yiscah Smith, spiritual guide and spiritual activist
יסודות התקשורת המקרבת
עם דניאל יואל כהן
ויכוחים, התרחקות, האשמה, או התחמקות
לחשוב שלהיות בקשר = להקריב
שיפוט עצמי / אחרים
כעס, עצב, כאב, עצבים, פחד, מתח, בדידות וכו׳
פעולה מתוך שחייב/ת, אמור/ה, צריך/ה…
נסיון לתקן אנשים במקום להקשיב להם/ן
כמיהה ליותר סיפוק או אינטימיות
לרמוז למה שאת/ה רוצה בתקווה שיבינו בעצמם
להיפגע מדברים או מעשים של אחרים
ואיך היו נראים החיים שלך עם יותר
חיבור ואינטימיות (שלא תלויים הסכמה)
נתינה מתוך שמחה
היכולות לאמר ׳לא׳ כשלא מתאים
חיבור–עצמי וידיעה איך לעבור מהרגשות מעיקות לחיבור ועשייה נבונה
אמפטיה לעצמך ולאחרים, גם עקב אכזבה
חופש וכח של בחירה
חיבור מלב ללב
בטחון לבקש את מה שאת/ה רוצה
וכישורים קונקרטיים להישאר מחובר/ת לעצמך, לזולת, ולחיים
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